One for the Blokes

When you wake up in the morning and your feet hit the ground you have a choice to make – “will today be a good day or a bad day”? In every practical sense you are in charge of your destiny, your goals, your plans and your life. You make it great or you don’t. We are only on this world for a short time so we may as well make it a great time.

After 40, something happens. We start to question things about our lives, our health, relationships, career, fitness, what we have achieved or not achieved, our future and other things to many to mention. The body doesn’t react to stress the way it used to. Going for a run was something you did 15 years ago. You get aches and pains you didn’t used to get, your body is suffering from your sports field war injuries, from your days as a high school or club athlete built of steel and bucketfuls of testosterone.

Before you know it, your 40, 45, 50 or 55 and older and you have kids and responsibilities. Your increased income doesn’t go as far as it should because your teenage money suckers constantly have their hands out for dancing shoes, guitar lessons, extra tuition, new footy boots, school trips and pocket money they don’t want to do any chores for. Then the ultimate slap in the face happens, you wake up, get out of bed and walk down the hallway and a six foot giant walks by you and says g’day Dad and pats you on the head – the little bugger isn’t shorter than you any more.

While all of this is taking place you are trying to further yourself in your career, deal with work mates, bosses, clients, shareholders, staff, unions, suppliers and compliance etc. This is draining and tiring, and starts to take over your mind. Before you know it you are completely out of balance and heavily work oriented.

Let’s not forget that you also have a relationship to maintain with your fishing, golf, sports night with the boys and of course your Wife or girlfriend or both if you have lost your way. The true love of your life, that sports vintage car is being neglected all this time and you just can’t seem to find the time.

To add insult to injury your body is changing and your hair is graying, your belly is expanding, and your neck flops over your collar. You haven’t had a health check for years and you have put off going to the dentist (it hurts and they cost to much). You puff going up the stairs because you don’t exercise, deep sleep is not possible because your brain just keeps firing on the 8 cups of coffee that have not made there way through your system. Your wife has been asleep for an hour - thank goodness, at least you don’t have to perform, it was hard enough just walking up the stairs.

In the shower you notice that one testicle is a little abnormal, but she’ll be right. Peeing is a little bit harder than it used to be, but she’ll be right. Your heart seems to be racing, but she’ll be right. You get headaches regularly, but she’ll be right. An erection is a memory and that really is annoying, you don’t feel quite the same without one of those from time to time. To top it all off, you are quietly grumpy and unhappy, you are not the mammoth hunter you used to be, but you will just keep that to yourself.

Seems like a bleak picture doesn’t it? You will recognise some of these things but hopefully will not be suffering from all of them. This is just a summary of the stuff we go through at some point after 40. At some point we just get anxious, grumpy and tired. We suffer from a lack of tolerance to just about everything and mostly we don’t know what to do about it.

The great thing is - we can do something about it. This is the purpose of ‘One for the Blokes’. To provide you with information and motivation that will enable you to change some or all of these things for the better and assist you to cope with life after 40. It is not a magic elixir, because life is not a game of perfect. It is about understanding and being armed with some skills and knowledge that will assist you in making decisions about your health, fitness and wellbeing and ultimately to assist you in creating some quality, energy and balance in your life.

If you feel as though you need some assistance in this area then email for info, I can do one on one consultations or a whole workshops for the men in your business. To all the women reading this encourage your man to take his health and well being seriously, if you need help just email me. mark@executivecoaching.co.nz

Yo Rocky

I am writing this while watching Rocky Balboa, the last movie in the rocky series. To me Rocky 1 is the best Rocky movie but this last one comes close. Rocky 1 managed to grab my imagination. I was a teenage athlete at the time with my dreams of Olympic sport. The more I look back, the more I remember about how energised I was and how excited I was about the chance to chase my Olympic dream. I was 17 when I started to formulate my plans I was 27 when they they came true. I had no money, and no regular job - kept getting sacked because I was going overseas all the time. But, nothing was going to get in my way and I worked my arse off.

Now that I have been self employed for the last 20 years I have to consciously remind myself of the energy I had - I don't think business will replace the adrenaline buzz, but it does offer some unique challenges. Staying on top of your game is all you can do, and the way to do that is to feed off the initial energy that got you in the game in the first place. Remember the energy and the excitement.

Remember Rocky running up the stairs in Philadelphia with that theme music playing - I do, I was about 16 and my knees could take the punishment. The knees are now shot to hell, the body is nearly 47 but the muscles still remember those runs. On my list of 101 things to do before I die, is the run up the stairs in my sweats with my headphones playing the the theme from Rocky.

Do you remember the energy and the buzz that got you in your game. When things get tight as they are at the moment it might well be a worthwhile exercise.

Go Rocky.

Check your fire alarm

Currently on TV The fire department are running some very good adverts about checking your fire alarm while the ads are on - "now is a good time to take a minute and check your fire alarm". Its brilliant - we did it and it took about 30 seconds. That 30 seconds could save my children's lives one day. Just think about that! 30 seconds to save my family.

In the media right now there are numerous columns about the state of business confidence, recession, falling property market, over valued property market, price hikes in basic foods, a dollar that is to strong, we need tax cuts, we need interest rate cuts No hang on a minute we need to start saving, no we need to get our cash flow up, but fuel prices are through the roof, the finance market is keeling over, "oh the humanity" (wasn't that from the reporter who commentated the Zeppelin explosion back in the 1930's).

So do you have any hair left on your head after witnessing the business world being obliterated right in front of your eyes. This might be a good time to check your fire alarms if you haven't already. Take half a day and take stock of your business. Step back and have a good look at things in relation to the current market you are operating in.

1. Are your costs being well managed?
2. Are you maximising your skills base?
3. What value can you add to your clients purchase in terms of knowledge and service?
4. What markets have you not tapped into yet?
5. Who on your database have you not contacted for a while?
6. Review your business plan - brush the dust off it and see where you are at.
7. What collaborations can you make to increase your market?
8. Have a look at all the small things you take for granted and make sure they are not
costing you in terms of money, time and inefficiency.

The list could go on and on - but you get my point. Check your fire alarms. I remember a speech that Michael Barnett of the Chamber of Commerce gave at the Waipa business awards once. He said that a survey of 1000 Auckland businesses showed that 80% of them thought the economy was negative but at that same time, the same group thought they were doing alright in their own business. You work out the logic.

Ultimately we are not in a depression so we have an opportunity to smarten up our act and make sure that we are as fire proof as we can be.

Check your fire alarms, reset your goals and create new strategies. Rock on!